a post for the fun of it.

Since I've lived in my very grown-up lady apartment, all by my grown-up self, I have developed a habit of perpetually saying (most) of my thoughts aloud. As if the All-Seeing Lord of my life needs a play-by-play (after all, He's the only One listening). But because I haven't stopped talking since I could form words, I just go about my life stating the obvious to...well, anybody who can hear what's going on in apartment 205. It doesn't really matter if another human is listening, priorities are priorities, and so...talk I must! 

I walk about my house...

Giving precursors:  "I think I'll have..." (dinner announcement) 

Verbalizing responses:  "Ooo! So pretty..." (leafing through a magazine)

Making passing observations:  "I should probably paint my toes..."

Announcing plans:  "Ok. I'm going to clean for 20 minutes. Just 20."

Encouraging myself:  "You can do it, Amanda. Good job! Look! You're so organized and so smart! And you did that all by yourself!" (Can you tell I do a lot of that? I do. And don't knock it. I firmly believe it's healthy.)

There are no pets in my apartment to enjoy the narrative. There used to be a couple fish, but I think I bored them to death. Or maybe I overfed them because I fed them when I ate...whatever the case, they make their home in Heaven now. 

As it goes in life, you cannot hide your habits, your actual character, when you leave your house. (I can't anyway. God is bent on humiliating me with any hidden things in my life). And so anywhere, at any time, if I perceive I am alone, I will inevitably voice any and every thought. Sing whatever comes to mind (as loudly as I hear it in my head). Tell Jesus whatever I need to say to Him. And, occasionally, dance if it strikes me as necessary. 

Today, my office is empty. And so, I'm singing to myself (because in my head I sound exactly like Adele singing "Right as Rain"). I sip a Diet Coke and say aloud, "I love Diet Coke." I tell myself what I'm doing as I work, "Ok. Good. Now, let's email so-and-so and then we'll process that paperwork and work on the message for Wednesday" (who is "we" anyway?). I encounter a sugar craving and exclaim, "Ooooh. I want some peanut M&M's." 

And then, as I walk into the next room, I find Brother Ed, one of the many incredible men of our church, working on a bathroom we're renovating. He's classy, so he'll act like he didn't hear me. And I'm embarrassed, so I'll act like there's no way he could have. And I'll go back to office and continue my "conversation". 

Our pastors are out of the office for two weeks. And my co-worker is part-time. You should probably sneak into the church office if you need some entertainment in the next few days...

(this was two weeks ago when I, alone, found out my eye fit perfectly in the hole of our VBS doorhangers. aren't you glad I documented the occasion?)