And the Bride...ate ice cream

I have struggled with my weight my whole, livelong, entire life. It's been a daily difficulty - striving to make good choices, falling off the wagon, starting over. Though my weight hasn't fluctuated greatly, my dress size has always been a great matter of stress and anxiety for me.

When I started to think I may be getting married, my initial thought was, "I've got to go on a diet! I want to lose at least ___ pounds before a wedding!!!" And I thought back to every friend I've stood beside as they've starved, sweated and strained to reach their "wedding weight". My next thought was, "Do I want to be a skinny bride, or a happy bride?"

Though those two things don't need to be mutually exclusive, I felt that if I pinned all my desire for weight loss on my wedding, the overall wedding happiness and bridal bliss might suffer. Weight loss for me is a longterm goal and a life-altering experience. It's not a superficial, how-do-I-look, sort of a thing.

One of my favorite parts of planning my wedding is that I've been able to do much of it with one of my "fristers" (friend/sister). Meagan and I quickly realized that we had the same ideology about the bridal weight loss campaign.

One afternoon, as we ran some errands for Meagan's wedding, we decided we needed a frosty from Wendy's to keep our motivation flowing. As we drove away, jr frosties in hand, Pastor Mom quipped, "Girls! We've got weddings coming up. This will be our last frosty for quite some time!"

Meagan and I glanced at each other, shrugged, and scraped the bottom of our cups for the last bit of ice cream. You could tell our sentiment was, "Maybe the last frosty for you!".

With so many things to worry about in planning a wedding (and a move at the same time!), becoming my goal weight in the bat of an eye just can't fit on my plate (pun completely intended). That will come, in time.

For now, I will revel in the fact that I will be the most beautiful, size *cough cough* bride you have EVER SEEN!

I have lists of to-do's and to-call and to-pay strewn all over my house. Along with the clean laundry I haven't had a moment to fold. My fridge is wondering if it will ever see food again as a half-eaten watermelon and a bottle of water stare out at me. And my purse looks like I've been collecting trash from the side of the road in it. But - one step at a time, it's all getting done!

Thanks for all your prayers and encouragement. I got an extra special FB message last week from someone who planned their wedding in a similar predicament - no mom, moh or fiance in the tri-county area! Thank you for your kind words.

And now, it's off to a day of wedding work!

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This has been such an emotional time, and today is no exception. Today marks one year since the loss of my Grandmother. I miss her especially now, as this important day approaches. I can't believe she didn't get to meet Webb (or should I say, he didn't get to meet her?). But I am comforted today by God's loving hand. He knows...

(the message and picture above are from Rep. Gabby Giffords)

we miss your smile.