The Catch 22's of Life

Yesterday, Cirelda stopped by our office here. She and her husband have been homeless for five months. Work for them slowed dramatically and, month by month, their life declined until they found themselves unable to pay rent and evicted. Nowhere to go but their car. So, for five months, they've searched for work and lived in their Jeep. 

Cirelda spoke clear English, though her second language. And was happy to show us her social security card - confirming her citizenship. She only asked for food. Not money. When we brought her a box of food (they had not eaten in two days because the mission is also low on food and funds), she politely mentioned that they could use some gas money as well. We gave her a little cash (we've generally got some tight policies on such things, but she was genuine and humble and we were compelled to do what we could. Not to mention she offered to mop our floors for any money at all and, when we put it in her hand, she emphatically told me she'd get it back to us as soon as she could). 

She told me about her latest job search. She had gone to Burger King where they told her she could get 40 hours a week. She was ecstatic. They said it would be basic food service and some cleaning at the end of the day. "I was excited. I found an apartment we could rent for $300 a month and I knew if I took this job, we would be able to have a home. At least somewhere to sleep." The manager hired her; gave her a starting date. And then, he walked away briefly to converse with another manager.

When he came back, Cirelda's bright moment dissipated, "I'm sorry. I wasn't aware but the position had been filled." She was very aware of what happened. See, Cirelda doesn't have the money for a dentist. And she is missing most of her teeth - all but one. She also knows that this look is consistent with those who do drugs, though she doesn't and never has. So, with no money for a dentist, and no job unless her teeth are fixed, Cirelda has no possibility of a job. Or a home. A warm place to sleep. A normal existence...

But God. 

Don't you love that phrase? The one where God does the "impossible" and leaves all human reasoning confounded and inept. Maybe tonight you will be able to go home and sleep in a warm - even fashionable - bed. Maybe you will be surrounded by people who love you. Maybe you will drive a car that generally succeeds in route from a to b. 

But there are the other parts of life. Those catch 22's. 

The ones you can't do a thing about but yet, something must be done. The wandering soul so close to your heart. The lost loved one you can't bring back. The financial situation in which your hands are tied. And when we have done all we can, we have worked like it depends on us and we have prayed like it depends on God, we sit back. Perhaps tearfully, perhaps peacefully, perhaps fighting off flushes of anxiety and worry. But we sit back and wait for the "but God" moment. 

It will come; it will. And when it does, enjoy your reasoning being confounded and your deepest fears being revealed as totally irrelevant. 

Pray for Cirelda tonight.